Being a youtuber

Today I had my first ever negative remark (well that I know of) about my videos. One of my friends turned to me at lunch today and said "I watched your videos... they're gay." And I didn't react at all, I just went "Aw thanks" and laughed it off. I went through the rest of the day fighting back tears, I didn't want to make my mum and dad unhappy seeing me so sad about something so tiny and insignificant. I always felt as if I need to be that person that doesn't feel upset about much ever and be the sort of bright glow you can rely on to be happy or whatever in my family and friendship group, but that's really hard when you are a youtuber. I don't hate this girl for saying that my videos were gay, I always thought that being kind and generous and not reacting was so much good already, but actually forgiving these people and not hating them for their opinions is a MILLION times more amazing than anything in the world.
           Martin Luther King always said, do not hate these people, these people may have a purpose to hurt you, but fighting back will only make you worse.

"Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate, only love can do that." - Martin Luther King jr.

This is such an important thing to know as, this person this mean, cruel person wasn't born bad. Every child is born with a clean, pure heart and their own thoughts and feelings. This person was probably moulded into this mean being out to hurt you by other people. But don't blame those either as they were probably moulded by others, and this goes on and on and it will now be impossible to actually find a person who could start it all. But it's not impossible to end it all, maybe all they need is someone to love them for who they are rather than trying to change them and mould them into this ugly being. That's why we need good people who are willing to accept others they way they are, mean or not mean.

I am incredibly happy on youtube, it just keeps giving me more and more knowledge and opportunities. I meet so many wonderful people who continue to inspire me every day and I'm only on 50 subscribers (That is official now as I have permenently deleted my old channel so I am totally reliant on missleemakeup). We are such a family, youtube really is the perfect community because there are like 90% good people all out to do the same thing and that's make videos and have fun and inspire people (there are occasionally a few people who aren't so nice but remember what I said before) I cannot imagine leaving this place now, it is really my second home it means so much!

Who is that girl on the front cover of your magazine? Do you know her? Do you know this girl? Do you think you have anything in common with her? Is she really like she says? Probably not. The truth is, we compare ourselves to these unreal, fake, not to mention stunningly beautiful (and airbrushed) girls all the time. We might not even realise it, I know I do it I always look at their waists. I always think, why is it no matter how little I eat and how much exercise I do, I don't look like these amazing girls? Who is bubzbeauty. She is a down to Earth girl who is knowledgable, kind and inspirational. Do I know her? I could go to her for anything, any advice and help and if she doesn't help, someone like her will. Do I have anything in common with her? We both love youtube, deathnote, makeup, urban decay makeup, shopping, inspirational videos, having fun, Japan, designing clothes and the list goes on and on. Is she self-concious? Hell yes. Am I? Of course! Do I compare myself to her? No. She is her own person, she taught me that. Instead of being jealous of her and wishing to be like her, like the girls in the magazines, I love and learn from her every day. She taught me how to be me. I could answer the same questions about so many people on youtube, could I answer any for Cat Deely? No.

             A few years ago when I first started watching youtube videos and becoming interested in them, I used to wonder if I'd ever be good enough to inspire someone. And I have hardly any subscribers, hardly any videos, hardly any views and I've inspired four people. FOUR. Four people with lives and family and history and everything, all there and i've influenced them to an extent of which 2 started their own videos and both succeeded amazingly well so far in them. I never EVER want to stop getting that feeling, I actually did that I actually became good enough to be inspirational to people, and I haven't even started yet.

Youtube means a lot to me now, it's my confidence, my inspiration and my land of opportunities. Youtube is what you make it, as is everything else in life.

Never forget that people will hear to you if you speak loud enough, but listen to you if you speak well enough.